Well it's been about a year and half since I posted here and just as I start to wonder where the time went my 18 month old daughter runs buy leaving a wake of delightful destruction behind her. There have been many odd little projects, lots of thrifting and of course Lydia herself and all the things she has taught me would have been worth sharing with you. Despite all that, this has been the hardest couple of years of my life this last year being the worst. I have had many things to post about but somewhere in the struggle I seem to have lost my voice. I would say that months before I stopped posting here I had begun to struggle with what to share, how to speak to you and even more so how to segregate all the different pieces of my life, my feelings about my work, starting a new family, my changing business and how to be personal and professional at the same time became such a struggle that I had nothing left to say....at least not that I felt comfortable sharing.
My birthday to me has always been like New Years in the sense that this is the time that I look back at the year, this is the time for making resolutions and plans, this is the time to look forward. This time last year I wasn't feeling strong enough to do much looking ahead, I was in survival mode so no grand plans were devised. I just put my head down and planned to survive. Don't get me wrong it has been an honor and a joy to be a mother to a little girl that I will say with all my motherly bias is the worlds most perfect, smartest, funniest, most talented child in all the world. Her laugh alone could I'm sure save whole war torn countries. But...I'm still a woman, a partner, a friend, an artist and a handful of other things that have begun to seem so very far away.
I have spent this last year and a half devoted to the health and happiness of Miss Lydia Katie and despite the lack of sleep, social interaction and hygiene it was worth it! In saying that, it has become pretty obvious lately that to continue to serve my daughter I will need to begin to live again in some sort of reasonable manner. I have not yet completely laid out what might be considered a reasonable plan of action but the idea of applying some mascara and wearing something other than track pants has crossed my mind.
So if all goes well you will see me again soon! Maybe even in real life!! I can't imagine!!! But first I need to rewrite what may as well be a completely defunct blog bio (thats going to take some time), change a diaper and if I'm really lucky Ill get to have a shower. Keep your fingers crossed for me.
1 comment:
*fingers crossed*
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